Relationship Jokes

An elderly couple were sitting together watching television. During one of those commercials, the husband asked his wife, “Whatever happened to our make love relations?” After a long thoughtful silence,…

An elderly man told his wife, Honey we have done everything in our life except ride in an aeroplane. Let’s do it, she said OK. They went to the airport…

The husband comes home drunk and breaks some crockery, vomits and falls down on the floor: His wife pulls him up and cleans everything. The next day when he gets…

A young newlywed couple wanted to join a church. The pastor told them, “We have special requirements for new parishioners. You must abstain from having make love for two weeks.”…

The old man placed an order for one hamburger, French fries and a drink. He unwrapped the plain hamburger and carefully cut it in half, placing one half in front…

Little Johnny comes home from school and his Grandma asks him about his day. Little Johnny says, “Oh, the school was fun. We were learning make love education. The teacher…

Johnny told dad to take a shower. “I’m scared, can I take a shower with you?” Johnny said. “No, son, that would be weird,” his father replied. “Please?” he cried….

Dolly wanted a new living room set but her husband kept saying. “No.” Every day she would ask him to please let her have the set. Every day he would…

A newly married couple was walking through a garden, suddenly a dog ran towards them. They both knew it will bite them. The husband lifted his wife and let the…

An elderly couple is both lying in bed one morning, having just woken from a good night’s sleep. He takes her hand and she responds. “Don’t touch me” “Why not.”…

A drunk staggers into a diner and orders a couple of eggs. The waiter, suspecting that they’ve run out, goes back to question the chef. “Hey, Gus, do we have…

A woman goes to her boyfriend’s parents’ house for dinner. This is her first time meeting the family and she is very nervous. They all sit down and begin eating…

Little Johnny and Billy were engaging in the time-honoured tradition of a verbal battle like little boys all over the world. “My Father is better than your Father!” Billy declared….

Two couples are having their wedding reception in the same hotel, and the two grooms are having a few beers together at the bar. “I bet I make love to…

Little Johnny was playing in his room,… when his dad walked in and explained that he and his mom were getting a divorce. “Why Daddy?” asked a confused Little Johnny….

A middle aged man was talking to his elderly father. “I wanted to thank you dad, I remember when I was younger and first dating girls you gave me a…

A married couple is sleeping when the phone rings at 3 AM. The wife picks up the phone and, after a few seconds, replies, “How am I supposed to know?…

The Wolf Man comes home one day from a long day at the office. “How was work, dear?” his wife asks. “Listen! I don’t want to talk about work!” he…