A woman walks into a cafe
A woman walks into a cafe with a stomach ache. After a while she realizes she needs to relieve herself, knowing her farts are loud, she decides to fart simultaneously…
-
-
How would you describe me
Wife: “How would you describe me?” Husband: “ABCDEFGHIJK.” Wife: “What does that mean?” Husband: “Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot.” Wife: “Aw, thank you, but what about…
-
The Boss would not allow him to leave
A Guy urgently needed a few days off work, But, he knew the Boss would not allow him to leave. He thought that maybe if he acted “Crazy” Then he…
-
Two women are walking home
Two women are walking home from the bar, they both have to piss so they slip into a nearby cemetery. One uses her underwear to wipe herself, and the other…
-
The maid answers the phone
A man is about to enter a meeting at work when he realizes that he forgot some important paperwork. He calls home so that his wife can retrieve them. The…
-
A couple drives to the hospital
A couple drives to the hospital because the wife is in labor. The doctor alerts them that she invented a machine that will transfer some of the labor pain to…
-
A man came home from work
A man came home from work, sat down in his favorite chair, turned on the TV, and said to his wife, “Quick, bring me a beer before it starts” She…
-
Two men were talking
Two men were talking. “So, how’s your make love life?” “Oh, nothing special. I’m having Social Security make love.” “Social Security make love?” “Yeah, you know, I get a little…
-
A man joins a soccer team
A man joins a soccer team and his new teammates inform him, “At your first team dinner as the new guy, you will have to give us a talk about…
-
A married man having a affair
A married man was having an affair with his secretary. One day, their passions overcame them in the office and they took off for her house. Exhausted from the afternoon’s…
-
A child asked his father
A child asked his father, “How were people born?” So his father said, “Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on.” The…
-
Twins
The young wife went into labor while her husband was overseas serving in the war. The next day he got the news that his wife had delivered twins. He got…
-
A Married Couple Is Sleeping
A married couple is sleeping when the phone rings at 3 AM. The wife picks up the phone and, after a few seconds, replies, “How am I supposed to know?…
-
The Biggest Boots
An old lady went into a bar in Ibiza and saw a man with his feet propped upon a table. He had the biggest boots she’d ever seen. The old…
-
I’d like to try the bet!
The local bar was so sure that its bartender was the strongest man around that they offered a standing $1000 bet. The bartender would squeeze a lemon until all the…
-
Become the best person!
The Pencil Maker took the pencil aside, just before putting him into the box. “There are 5 things you need to know,” he told the pencil, “Before I send you…
-
A Few Puns I Thought Of While Trying
A few puns I thought of while trying not to get out of bed . What did the Alabama sister say to her sibling? “Cum at me bro” Why did…
-
Farts Problem
A little old lady goes to the doctor and says, “Doctor I have this problem with gas, but it really doesn’t bother me too much. My farts never smell and…