Clean Jokes

A man and a woman are having dinner in a restaurant. Their waitress, taking another order at a table a few paces away, spots that the man is slowly sliding…

This is Awesome, One smart father goes to his son. Father: “I want you to marry a girl of my choice” Son: “I will choose my own bride!” Father: “But…

Three blondes are in an elevator when the elevator suddenly stops and the lights go out. They try using their cell phones to get help, but have no luck. Even…

A married couple are driving along a highway doing 60mph, the wife behind the wheel. Her husband suddenly looks over at her and says, “Honey, I know we’ve been married…

The wife was very unhappy with her old car and complained a lot to her husband: Knowing her birthday was coming up shortly, she said to her husband… “Buy me…

A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in their bed. She puts on her robe and goes downstairs to look for him. She finds…

A middle aged guy and his teenage daughter were riding a motor bike and taking a shortcut through a darkened park when they were stopped by a gang of muggers….

A man is talking to the family doctor, “Doctor, I think my wife is going deaf.” The doctor answers, “Well, here’s something you can try on her to test her…

After driving for about six hours, a trucker decides to pull over and sleep for a little while. As soon as he falls asleep, He is awoken by some knocks…

Three drunken guys entered a taxi after a heavy night of drinking. Immediately realizing that the men were inebriated,… Cab driver quickly thought up a plan to get rid of…

A man who drank a lot was told by his wife “If you ever come home drunk again, I’m going to leave you”. Regardless, that night he went out to…

One day, there were two boys playing by a stream. One of the young boys saw a bush and went over to it. The other boy couldn’t figure out why…

A man took his pregnant wife to the hospital. The doctor looked her over and told them it would be a rather difficult delivery. He offered to let the couple…

Mickey Mouse steps into lawyers office to review divorce with lawyer Mickey: I need to get out of this marriage! Minnie ruined my life. I’ve paid you good money for…

A young boy gets suspended from school. His mother was furious, and yelled ” “What did you do this time?!” The boy said all I did was tell a joke….

There were three ducks swimming in a pond one night after midnight and got arrested for trespassing. They were called to appear in court the next day so the judge…

A newly married Liam goes to the meet Father Charles. He greets the priest and says, ‘Father, I need to talk to you.’ The Priest asks, ‘Is it a confession,…

A woman has to go to Italy for a conference, so her husband drives her to the airport. “Thank you honey,” she says, “Is there anything I can bring back…