Funny Jokes

Two elderly grandparents from a retirement center were sitting on a bench under a tree when one turns to the other and says: “Slim, I’m 83 years old now and…

A man who smelled like a distillery flopped on a subway seat next to a priest. The man’s tie was stained, his face was plastered with red lipstick, and a…

Interviewers ask routine questions to candidates…. Some weird answers…. Q – Tell us about yourself ? A – Yourself is pronoun used when the subject and object of the verb…

A tired minister was at home resting, and through the window he saw a woman approaching his door. She was one of those too-talkative people, and he was not anxious…

A group of people were touring a university campus and they noticed several students on their hands and knees assessing the courtyard with pencils and clipboards in hand. “What are…

A guy walks into the bar of a restaurant and goes to the bartender and asks “how much for a beer?” The bartender replies “$1”. The customer completely amazed, orders…

A woman announces to her friend that she is getting married for the fourth time. “How wonderful! But I hope you don’t mind me asking what happened to your first…

A young Spanish teacher, fresh out of college, is hired at a public school. On her first day, the principal decides to observe, and sits down next to Little Johnny….

Two men, from a small town in Ireland, were looking at a mail order catalog and admiring the pictures of the models… Patrick said to Shane, “Have ye seen the…

A schoolteacher used to take a short nap every afternoon. When his pupils asked him why he did so, he said that he went to dreamland to meet ancient sages….

An elderly couple was just settled down for bed when the old man realized he left the lights on in the greenhouse in the back yard. Then they heard voices….

An elderly couple in their 80’s were going to Florida. At the border, the customs officer asks where they were going. The wife says “what did he say”. The husband…

One day, Little Johnny’s grandmother sent him to the water h*le to get some water for cooking dinner. As he was dipping the bucket in, he saw two big eyes…

A little boy walks into his parents’ room to see his mom on top of his dad bouncing up and down. The mom sees her son and quickly dismounts, worried…

An older lady was doing some house hold chores on a beautiful Sunday morning, when she suddenly heard the doorbell ring. She opened the door to see a well dressed…

The doctor that had been seeing an 80-year-old woman for most of her life, had finally retired. At her next checkup, her new doctor told her to bring a list…

A businessman enters a tavern, sits down at the bar, and orders a double martini on the rocks. After he finishes the drink, he peeks inside his shirt pocket, then…

A Very ‘Straight and Honest’ Girl is Going To Town Before she left, her mother gave her some advice: “Daughter, when you’re in Town and if you’re looking for a…