A lesson on good manners
A teacher was giving her class of small children a lesson on good manners. “Suppose, by mistake, you step on a lady’s foot. What do you do?” “I say ‘excuse…
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A bus stops and two Italian men
They seat themselves, and engage in animated conversation. The lady sitting behind them ignores their conversation at first, but she listens in horror as one of the men says the…
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A little boy asked his father
A little boy asked his father a question. “Dad, I know that babies come from mommies’ tummies, but how do they get there in the first place?” he asked innocently….
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Two lawyers arrive at the pub
Two lawyers arrive at the pub and order a couple of drinks. They then take sandwiches from their briefcases and began to eat. Seeing this, the angry publican approaches them…
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Three friends were at the bar
Three friends were at the bar talking, and after many rounds of beer, one of them suggests that everyone admits something they have never admitted to anyone. “Okay,” says the…
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A older couple wake up
An older couple wake up in the morning and the husband looks over at the woman and says, ‘Wow! You wouldn’t believe the dream I had…’ And the woman replied,…
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He says to the doctor
A concerned husband went to a doctor to talk about his wife. He says to the doctor, “Doctor, I think my wife is deaf because she never hears me the…
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Little Harry walks in the bathroom
Little Harry walks in the bathroom and sees his mum with no clothes on, standing in front of him, he looks up at her private parts he asks “What’s that…
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A drunk was sitting in a bar
A drunk was sitting in a bar looking at three small brown pellets in his hand. The bartender asked what they were, and the drunk replied “They are brain pills…they…
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A wife went in to see a therapist
A wife went in to see a therapist and said, “I’ve got a big problem doctor. Every time we’re in bed and my husband climaxes, he lets out this earsplitting…
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This man goes into the doctor
This man goes into the doctor with his ring privates in a terrible state, really bad now. Doctor: “What happened to you?” He says: “I was in Africa on safari…
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What seems to be the problem
“Doctor, I need your help,” the woman says. “What seems to be the problem?” “My husband just doesn’t satisfy me sensual. What can I do?” “Hmmm. That’s a bit out…
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A hunter goes into the woods
A hunter goes into the woods to hunt a bear. He carries his trusty 22-gauge rifle with him. After a while, he spots a very large bear, takes aim, and…
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A man walks along a lonely beach
A man walks along a lonely beach. Suddenly he hears a deep voice: “Dig!” He looks around: nobody’s there. “I am having hallucinations”, he thinks. Then he hears the voice…
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A man in a bar sees a friend
A man in a bar sees a friend at a table, drinking by himself. Approaching the friend he comments, “You look terrible. What’s the problem?” “My mother died in June,”…
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A family is at the dinner table
A family is at the dinner table. The son asks his father, ‘Dad, how many kinds of melons are there?’ The father, surprised, answers, ‘Well, son, there are three kinds…
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Sarah was reading a newspaper
Sarah was reading a newspaper, while her husband was engrossed in a magazine. Suddenly, she burst out laughing. “Listen to this,” she said. “There’s a classified ad here where a…
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A small boy is sent to bed by his father
A small boy is sent to bed by his father. Five minutes later: “Da-ad…” “What?” “I’m thirsty. Can you bring me a drink of water?” “No. You had your chance….