A elderly couple had dinner
An elderly couple had dinner at another couple’s house, and after eating, the wives left the table and went into the kitchen. The two elderly gentlemen were talking, and one…
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A blonde walks into a doctors office
One day a blonde walks into a doctors office with both of her ears burnt. The doctor asks her what had happened. She says, “well… when I was ironing my…
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He confesses to his wife
One day he confesses to his wife that he has a terrible urge to stick his manhood into the pickle slicer. His wife suggests that he see a therapist to…
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A woman husband had been slipping in coma
A woman’s husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she had stayed by his bedside every single day. One day, when he came…
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A wealthy man has lost his wallet
A man finds a wallet with $700 in it. A few days later, he reads a notice stating that a wealthy man has lost his wallet and is offering a…
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A old man is having a drink in a Chicago bar
A 71 year old man is having a drink in a Chicago bar Suddenly a gorgeous 19 year old girl enters and sits down a few seats away. The girl…
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He knocked on the door of one house
A neighborhood kid was looking for ways to earn money. He knocked on the door of one house, and when the man answered the boy asked, “Hey mister, got any…
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Two little boys were lying on stretchers
One day in the hospital, two little boys were lying on stretchers next to each other outside of the operating room. The first boy leans over and asks, “What are…
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A blind man went to restaurant
A blind man went to a restaurant. “Menu sir?” asked the owner. “I’m blind, just bring me one of your dirty forks. I will smell it and order.” The confused…
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He rushes upstairs to find his wife on the bed
A guy gets home early from work and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom. He rushes upstairs to find his wife undressed on the bed, sweating and panting. “What’s…
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A lawyer tries to make conversation when barber
A lawyer tries to make conversation when barber shaves his hair. Barber whispers in lawyer’s ear: This kid is one of the dumbest kids in the world! Look, watch out…
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A farmer is sitting in the neighborhood bar
A farmer is sitting in the neighborhood bar getting soused. A man comes in and asks the farmer, “Hey, why are you sitting here on this beautiful day getting drunk?”…
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She calmly writes down his order
A customer walks into a restaurant and notices a large sign on the wall that says, “$500 if we fail to fill your order.” When his waitress arrives, he orders…
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Three old ladies were sitting at the dinner table
Three old ladies were sitting at the dinner table discussing their problems with getting old. The first one said, “Sometimes I catch myself with a jar of mayonnaise in my…
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A man is in a bar and falling off his stool
A man is in a bar and falling off his stool every couple of minutes. He is obviously drunk So the bartender says to another man in the bar: “Why…
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A guy goes into a tattoo parlor
A guy goes into a tattoo parlor and asks for a tattoo of a $100 bill on his weapon. Curious, the tattoo artist asks him why he would possibly want…
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A man is lying on the beach
A man is lying on the beach, wearing nothing but a cap over his private part. A woman passing by remarks, “If you were any sort of a gentleman, you…
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A man and his wife are at a restaurant
A man and his wife are at a restaurant, and the husband keeps staring at an old drunken lady swigging her gin at a nearby table. His wife asks, “Do…