A blonde walks into the library
A blonde walks into the library. She walks up to the counter, slams a book down and screams at the librarian, “This is the worst book I’ve ever read! It…
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A blonde nun was praying in her room
One night a blonde nun was praying in her room when God appeared before her. “My daughter, you have pleased me greatly. Your heart is full of love for your…
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She is talking to her lawyer
A woman wants to divorce her husband, so she is talking to her lawyer. Lawyer: “Well first we need a reason, is he not giving you money?” Woman: “if he…
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Two little old ladies Connie and Jean
Two little old ladies, Connie, and Jean, were sitting on a park bench outside the local town hall where a flower show was in progress. The short one, Jean, leaned…
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The guy sat next to me on the train
The guy sat next to me on the train pulled out a photo of his wife and said, “She’s beautiful, isn’t she?” I said, “If you think she’s beautiful, you…
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A man meets a gorgeous woman in a bar
A man meets a gorgeous woman in a bar. They talk, they connect, they end up leaving together. They get back to her place, and as she shows him around…
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A man is having dinner with his new girlfriend family
A man is having dinner with his new girlfriend’s family. They spend the early part of the evening talking, getting to know each other, and just generally having a good…
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A boy and his dad are walking through the park
A boy and his dad are walking through the park During the walk the boy sees two men dressed as cowboys saunter by. ‘Dad, look at those bow-legged bastards!’ He…
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A local reporter wanted to interview the lady
A 90 year old woman just got married for the 4th time…. It was big news in a small town and a local reporter wanted to interview the lady for…
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A hunter had been out hunting bear
A hunter had been out hunting bear all day, when he came across a fast flowing river. The water was nice and cool, so he set his rifle down and…
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The teacher asks them
One day Little Johnny’s class is having an English lesson. The teacher asks them, “Who can use the word intelligent in a sentence?” Little Mary says, “The teacher is very…
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Man looks at his friend and says
Man looks at his friend and says “if you and a friend go camping you two get really drunk and in the morning you wake up with a rubber in…
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The Kid Asks His Dad
Son: “Daddy, I have to write a special report for school, but I don’t know what Politics is.” Father: “Well, let’s take our home as an example. I am the…
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James is alone in the bedroom
James is alone in the bedroom when his beautiful wife opens the door and walks in. “James,” she whispers, “Take off my shirt.” “James,” she whispers, “Take off my corset.”…
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Jenny was explaining to her husband
Jenny was explaining to her husband how much fun they’d had at the beach during her bridge club annual outing. “But,” she told him, “it didn’t end all that great…
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A american was touring Mexico
An american was touring Mexico. After his day’s sight-seeing, he stops at a local restaurant. While sipping his wine, he notices a sizzling, scrumptious looking platter being served at the…
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A older couple was lying in bed
An older couple was lying in bed one night. The husband was falling a sleep, but the wife felt romantic and wanted to talk. She said, “You use to hold…
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Two Irishman Mick and Paddy
Two Irishman, Mick and Paddy were walking home from the pub after drinking late night. Mick says to Paddy, “I can’t be bothered to walk all that way.” “I know,”…