A little old lady sold pretzels
A little old lady sold pretzels on a street corner. The price of a pretzel was 25 cents. Every day a young man would leave his office building at lunch…
-
-
A woman is in a coma
A woman is in a coma. Nurses are in her room giving her a sponge bath. One of them is washing her “private area” and notices that there is a…
-
Three old men were talking
Three old men were talking about how much their hands shook. The first old guy said, “My hands shake so bad, that when I shaved his morning, I cut my…
-
A man having lunch at restaurant
A man having lunch at a Chinese restaurant noticed that the table had been set with forks, not chopsticks. He asked why. The waiter said “Chopsticks are provided only on…
-
The boss joined a group of his workers
The boss joined a group of his workers at the coffee urn and told a series of jokes he’d heard recently. Everybody laughed loudly. Everybody, that is, except Mike. When…
-
A English teacher spent a lot of time
An English teacher spent a lot of time marking grammatical errors in her students’ written work. She wasn’t sure how much impact she was having until one overly busy day…
-
A boy looking through the family album
A young boy was looking through the family album and asked his mother, “Who’s this guy on the beach with you, with all the muscles and curly hair?” “That’s your…
-
Two guys were discussing life
Two guys were discussing life in general over drinks one night. “My grandfather lived to be 96.” “Ninety-six? What finally got him?” “Liquor and women.” “Well, that just goes to…
-
Two deaf people get married
Two deaf people get married. During the first week of marriage, they find that they are unable to communicate in the bedroom when they turn off the lights. After several…
-
A woman was shopping
A woman was shopping at her local supermarket where she selected: a half-gallon of 2% milk, a carton of eggs, a quart of orange juice, a head of romaine lettuce,…
-
A circle with their teacher
A group of young children were siting in a circle with their teacher. She was going around in turn asking them all questions. “Davy, what noise does a cow make?”…
-
Two strangers were seated
Two strangers were seated next to each other on a long flight when the first guy turned to the second and said, “Let’s talk. I’ve heard that flights will go…
-
A English teacher asked her class
An English teacher asked her class to write an essay on what they’d do if they had a million dollars. Alec handed in a blank sheet of paper. “Alec!” yelled…
-
This guy went into a night club
This guy went into a night club and saw a gorgeous honey sitting by herself at the bar, he asked her to dance. She agreed and they took to the…
-
Dinner at a posh restaurant
A man takes his visiting country cousin to dinner at a posh restaurant. They walk in, are ushered to a table by a formally dressed maitre d’, and seated at…
-
Two hunters get up early one morning
Two hunters get up early one morning to go hunting. They live way out in the country, so all they have to do is walk from the first hunter’s house…
-
A tourist walked into a pet shop
A tourist walked into a pet shop and was looking at the animals on display. While he was there, another customer walked in and went over to a cage at…
-
A foursome of senior golfers hit
A foursome of senior golfers hit the course with waning enthusiasm for the sport. “These hills are getting steeper as the years go by,” one complained. “These fairways seem to…